Spring Vacation 2011

We left for Florida today for a week of vacation and are really excited to get away and spend some isolated time with the girls. We left this morning at 8 AM and, true to form, we stopped twice before Atlanta. Breakfast and the potty are extremely important, right? The girls have no idea that we are going to spend a day or two at Disney world, and are sure to be urprised when we get there. The trip was long and the girls were sooooooooooo loud in the car, and since I can handle stress so well....

We have 4 total surprises for the girls, 2 we gave them today. We stopped in Macon, Ga to see our friend and the girls former babysitter, Amy! The girls had a blast and we were able to catch up. Tonight, Aunt Sherah drove over from Pensacola to spend the evening with us. Although her and Sue ditched us after dinner and went shopping.....

We are staying in Lake City, Fl tonight and are leaving for Orlando tomorrow morning. We will be there for 3 nights, then go to Tampa for 4 nights. Sue has a conference to attend, and I will be hanging with the girls. I'm thinking we will head for Clearwater Beach! Sue informed me today that as a part of her conference, there is a chance we could throw out the first pitch at a Yankees pre-season game as a part of a fund-raiser. We have no clue what the required fund is, but if I have the opportunity, I will represent the Orioles and give Jeter & Arod some chin music!

Sue has been working hard and so much, we are really looking forward to just getting away and relaxing. We are enjoying time with Sherah right now. What a great reminder that family is the most important thing, whether on vacation or not. Madelyn has taken time to thank us for "the best vacation ever" throughout the day. It makes me laugh because she says it at everything. For example, we went through McDonalds drive through and bought her eggs and bacon. She replied, "Daddy, I love you, this is the best vacation ever." I laughed but also cherished her pure and sincere little heart. I thought to myself, Madelyn, just wait until we get on the ferry to go to the magic kingdom.

Well, for those interested, I will be blogging a little throughout our vacation, as well as tweeting.

Stay at home dad

My last day of work at the Hotel was December 30th. It was nice to clock out and leave work behind. Now, at my new job, I cant seem to find the time clock and am unable to clock out! As you may or may not know, I am now a stay at home dad. My position at the hotel was scheduled to be eliminated in March, and with the cost of daycare and having to put Emma, our 4 month old in daycare, it made more sense for us for me to stay at home. More importantly, we really felt led by God for me to stay at home. To sum up how I feel about it, well, I absolutely love it! I get to be with my kids everyday and am able to accomplish things around the house. I am able to serve at our church a little more too.

God has been more than gracious to me, and He really does heal and repair lives. I am a huge believer in restoration. Restoration is hard and some people shy away from it. It has been, and will continue to be, a long, hard, yet rewarding journey. I have come to realize that if I cant disciple and serve my wife and kids, how can I ever be entrusted to do it again outside my family. I pray that God uses me to love, serve and disciple Sue and the girls.

Being at home has opened my eyes to a few things that are quite humorous:

1. The kids CONSTANTLY need something!

2. The baby will poop/barf right when you are trying to get out the door.

3. The kids can reach the threshold of pain decibel level in a matter of 1.6 seconds.

4. Just when you think you have a quiet moment.....

5. 2 year olds are amazing climbers, nay, fearless climbers.

6. Screaming at your kids, "hold on, I"M TRYING TO DO MY QUIET TIME," is counter-productive.

7. A 4 month old's head control is deceptive....it's not quite fully developed yet...

8. Why do I even get the paint out....?

9. My discipleship group loves making jokes that I should join a "moms support group."

10. Being the only dad to drop your kid off at parents day out welcomes all kinds of stares, and comments.

11. NIck Jr. has an awesome daily line up of tv shows. (so does the dvr).

12. Madelyn trying to do p90x with me makes me laugh and fall on my face while trying to do a push up.

13. My mother in law doesn't think I am serious about dropping them off every Friday so I can go play golf.

14. My father in law has become my go to, "help, I need (____________)."

15. I am a pushover...who doesn't love chips and cookies all day?

While it is humorous, it is also rewarding. I hear people say all the time they wish they could go back and have more time with their kids while they were young, well, I am trying to take full advantage of the time I have with them. I pray everyday that I can model a Christ and take time to talk to the girls about the Lord. Mostly, I pray that they see it in my life that they want to emulate it.

I know how I feel as a Father being with my kids all day, and I see them being more affectionate to me, that I can only imagine how God the Father must feel when we spend time with Him, and how we can become more affectionate to Him!

Pumpkin Patch Mountain

Yesterday was weird. I left at 2 in the afternoon to drive to Bakersville, NC to attend the viewing and funeral of my Uncle, Oscar Carl Webb Jr. Everyone called him Jr. I passed through the big towns of Unicoi, Bulladean, Loafers Glory, Red Hill, and Toecane. I arrived at 6:30, saw the family, sat through the funeral and left at 9:30 and pulled back in my driveway at 1:21 am. I used to visit my Aunt Naomi and Uncle Jr occasionally as a kid. As I arrived into town though, it was dark so what I could have recognized I couldn't even see. I have fond memories of their house and the surrounding area.

Jr was married to my moms sister. Funny part is, my dad dated Naomi before he broke up with her because her younger sister (my mom) was prettier. We weren't real close, but my mom and dad were very close to them. I remember my Uncle Jr telling me one time that for fun, he, Naomi, and my mom and dad, would dress up as railroad hobo's and go to families houses and beg for food and sit in their house until the family recognized them. That was a big night out for them! As I sat in the service and listened to some family and the Pastor say things about my Uncle, I was struck that He was exactly the kind of man I want to be. He loved God. He was always faithful to the Lord and to his church. He loved my Aunt and all of the family. He was fun and the family celebrated his life last night. Life is short and I want my life to be celebrated when it is all said and done. I have failed, stumbled, but the great hand of God has helped me and lifted me up and set my feet on a rock.

As I drove home, I remembered one time when I was around 7 years old, Jr asked me if I liked pumpkins. I said yeah, of course. He put me in his truck and drove me up Pumpkin Patch Mountain there in Red Hill, NC. There was an old shack up there and we went and sat on the porch and looked around at hundreds of pumpkins. He then turned my attention a little higher to the breath-taking view of the Blue Ridge mountains. It was beautiful. I remember my Uncle Jr saying, "Isn't it something to know the One who made that?" Well Uncle Jr, you are now with Him. We miss you, but we long for the day that we will all be together again.

Turn Ahead

I love when the Lord shows me something fresh in the Word. I am studying 1 Thessalonians right now, and I came across a part in v.9 that says, "...and how you turned to God from idols to serve the living and true God." I remember hearing a message in which this was referenced. I was struck with the truth.

I think too often we get repentance wrong. Have you ever struggled with something and could not figure out how to quit running to it? I know I have, and if you are honest with yourself, you probably have too. The struggle is consuming and frustrating. At the end of the day you feel like a failure and a horrible Christian. The wording in this verse is incredible because I think we get the equation wrong. We identify the "problem" or "thing" and we just "try really hard" to not go back to it. We label it and set boundaries, both of which are good and sometimes even necessary. We attempt to just turn "from" it rather than just turning "to something. The verse says "how you turned to God from idols." I am not suggesting that all issues will be solved, however when we turn to something, it is much easier to leave or forget the previous. I remember when I purchased my PS3. It was very easy to let go of the PS. The few times we have bought a new vehicle, we like to drive it rather than the old one.

As we walk our faith we will encounter resistance and traps from the enemy. Take heart, He has overcome them. Turning to Him is much better than trying on our own power.

I love the Words in the hymn penned by Helen H. Lemmel, " Turn your eyes upon Jesus, look full on His wonderful face, and the things of earth will grow strangely dim, in the light of His glory and grace."

Potato Chips

I am continually amazed at the lessons God reminds me of through my children. James 1:17 says, "Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change." I know we have heard all of our lives that everything is from God, but let's be honest, we don't always have that mindset. At least I don't. This last week a few things happened that made me realize that God enjoys giving gifts! (I'm really tempted to quote the cheerful giver verse right here). It's not just that God is obligated to give us things because He is God, rather it's part of His nature to give. See John 3:16. He loves giving to us.

This past week was Madelyn's birthday and we loaded her with gifts, but that's not when I was struck with my glimpse into God's heart. On Tuesday, Sue was working late and I was in charge of dinner. Sandwhiches and chips! As we were eating, Madelyn ate all her chips first, of course. (So did I). Then Madelyn asked for more chips, and I told her I would get her some. She said "No Daddy, I want to share yours." At that moment it struck me that our Father has it all and we are just sharing it. It was with the utmost pleasure that I set her in my lap and shared my chips with her.

God owns all the potato chips in the world and has pleasure in sharing them with His children. The best place for us is in His lap enjoying what He has for us!

An Extremely Important Meeting

I came home one day this week on my lunch break to see the girls. They love when I come home which only fuels my ego, unfortunately. Madelyn was begging me to stay and play with her. I desperately wanted to, however, I had a meeting at work with my boss and I would be home late. Madelyn suggested that her and I have a "very important meeting" tonight, just the two of us. Mommy and Casey "were not invited." I asked Madelyn, "what will we do at the meeting?" After careful deliberation, Madelyn announces that we will "play the Big Bad Wolf, eat ice cream and potato chips." Sounded good to me!

I arrived home and we had dinner, bathed the girls, read stories, and finally laid Casey down for "night-night." Sue asked Madelyn if she was ready for bed. Madelyn responded with a convincing no, comes over to where I was sitting, crawls up in my lap and whispers in my ear, "Daddy, it's time for our meeting." She hadn't forgotten. So, we made our way to her bedroom and we took turns huffing and puffing, and blowing each other's houses down. We laughed and had an awesome time. She ran to me to hug me and said, "daddy, I love you so much."

I thought it was time for bed now. How quickly was I reminded that meeting was only half over. It was now time for ice cream and potato chips. I retrieved our snack and we cuddled in the chair to watch Olivia and devour our delightful cuisine. I asked Madelyn how the meeting went. She gazed back up and simply stated, "perfect, dad."

I reflected as we sat there a few more minutes. We can get so caught up in life that we forget all the important things. I can't wait until our next meeting! It was so easy to take thirty minutes and totally make her day. Or, did she make mine?

My hand in His

Our Christmas break this year has been great. Sue and I both have ten days off! We had a beautiful Christmas eve dinner and time of opening presents at Nana & Papa's (Sue's mom and dad's). Madelyn joyfully opened up her annual gift from Papa; a tub of cheese balls which the whole family enjoys! Later that night after Madelyn and Casey were asleep I had the luxury of assembling "The Doll House" that Santa was bringing Madelyn. If I ever meet the real Santa, I am gonna ask him why he can't put the presents together too. Bum.

Casey rose early on Christmas morning and Sue and I played with her until Madelyn woke up. They loved all the gifts! The living room looked like the wrapping paper aisle blew up. Toy and game parts were flying as boxes were being opened. I couldn't help but sit back and cherish every second of it. How things change in a year! God has been so good to me and the family. I sat there and shuttered at the thought that I almost lost all of it. However, I didn't by the grace of God!

Saturday after Christmas day we traveled to West Virginia to see Sue's family. Grandma Casey had her 85th birthday party on Saturday and Sue's Uncle has cancer. It was a great time to be with all the family. We were even able to squeeze in "The Squeakal." Madelyn loved it and loved sitting with her little cousin Savannah.

On Sunday afternoon was probably one of the sweetest times I have had with Casey. She was so tired! She was like a little pinball running and slamming into things and people. As she was walking she would just give up and dive on the floor and take a 20 second retreat and then go back at it. I scooped her up and took her to the bedroom at laid down with her. It took a minute to get the bucking bronco to settle down for her nap. As she started to relax, she slid her hand in mine and gazed up at me with her gorgeous eyes. She looked at me with complete comfort and trust. She put her fingers between mine and laid her head on my shoulder as we turned on the pillow and she fell asleep. I tried to pull my hand away and as I did she tightened her grip. She was most secure. It made me think, do I grab my Father's hand and rest solely on Him? Do I gaze at Him or am I easily distracted? Do I rest in Him or do I remain in turmoil and worry?

It is way better when we grab His hand, gaze at Him, and lay our complete trust and security in Him.

What a day!!

Madelyn had her tonsils taken out this morning. They were HUGE! Sue and I were nervous because last October Madelyn had tubes put in her ears and her adenoids removed. She had a difficult time as she woke up from the anesthetic becoming extremely disoriented and hysterical. It was heart breaking. We were anxious to say the least.

The morning started early as I woke up at 4:45, fifteen minutes before the alarm was set. As I got ready I was praying that God would allow Madelyn to do well this time. Sue and I got her up and collected all the things we anticipated needing. With the amount of stuff we took, one might have mistaken it for a three day getaway. Instead, it was a six hour whirlwind trip to the hospital. As we arrived to register, Madelyn made full use of the play area. She took over and was LOUD!!! There was another child there who stared at Madelyn cautiously and chose to stay in the comfort of his moms arms. Our name was called and we went back to the holding room. The tech then entered and needed some blood from Madelyn. She did fine, but I about lost it. Let's just say I hate needles.

The best part was when they gave Madelyn what I call, "the goofy juice." The medicine to take them through the wardrobe into another land. Madelyn burst through that door into the land of loopy very quickly. I tried to help her walk to the sink and it felt as though she was more drunk than the bozo in the cheap seats at (insert your team stadium cheap seat section). We then took Madelyn to the pre-op room where she completely lost control of her head. She laughed a lot and told us that Boots the monkey, Dora's sidekick, was tickling her. Next thing we know, we were answering the same set of questions for the fifth time. Next time I am gonna print out all of the important information and hand it out. She last ate at 7:45 last night. No she hasn't had anything to drink this morning, and yes, she is allergic to penicillin. They took Madelyn off and Sue and I went back to our room, looked at each other, embraced and prayed for our little angel.

I know it's just a tonsillectomy, but there is always that little feeling in your gut when it's your kid.

Now the moment we had been needing. STARBUCKS!!!! I ran down to the elevator and eagerly anticipated the white mocha with hazelnut. I was quickly captured by the Chic-fil-a express. I made it back to the room, set up my OCD perfect environment for devouring my food, and the phone rang. For a second, as I answered the phone and the voice on the other end declared, "this is Dr. Barnes," I was scared. Did something go wrong? Is she ok? Did they mistake her for the right leg amputation procedure? "Yes," I replied. "I am done, Madelyn did great. She will be heading to recovery soon," Dr. Barnes announced. What a relief. Dr. Barnes later told us that the tonsils were each bigger than a quarter, were touching in the back of her throat, and that it made him wonder how she could eat, sleep, or even breathe. (See picture on my twitter link)

Madelyn recovered well and regained her rare form screaming for and demanding a popsicle, then another one. And then another. She made it home and quickly found herself in time-out twice in thirty minutes. That's my girl.

I was reminded again today of The Father's love and concern for His kids. He loves me, O how He loves me.

Thank you for all who prayed today. All the prayers and comments mean a lot to Sue and me.

Messes can be cleaned up. Thankfully!

I love all the toys we have and games we play with Madelyn and Casey. Madelyn's imagination is fascinating. One minute we can be rescuing animals, the next having tea with the queen, and finally making blueberry soup on a rainy afternoon. (We haven't quite perfected the recipe yet but we are diligently working on it.) Casey on the other hand is content with a soggy piece of bread but seems to prefer electronics. She especially loves all my gadgets like the computer, my cell phone, and the remote.

My girls continue to be the best educator in my life. One day last week Madelyn and I were playing in her room. We were working in the flower garden to be more specific. I had a drink in the room with me that I put on her dresser. I failed to realize that I put it right next to the "seeds" we would eventually need. As Madelyn went charging after the seeds she knocked the glass over and my drink spilled all over the dresser, her, and the carpet. She panicked, jumped back, and full of fear she said, "Daddy, I am so sorry. I'm so sorry Daddy, please don't be mad." She got me! As soon as we locked eyes and I heard her sweet, pitiful, and sorry words, I was moved with compassion as I realized the angst she was living, and I said, "Sweetheart, messes can easily be cleaned up. It was just an accident. I love you, Daddy isn't mad at you. Let me clean this up and we can keep playing." Immediately my heart was pricked and I started crying as I imagined how our Heavenly Father feels when we realize what we have done and we cry out to Him.

It really is something to think how we can run so far from God or destroy our lives, or other people's lives for that matter, and with one cry to our amazing God, He cleans up that mess instantly. While there are consequences and effects of our decisions and sin, God will and does cleanse and restore. I promise. I am living proof. This morning on the tenth floor of a hotel in midtown Atlanta while Sue was on the computer, the girls watching Mickey Mouse clubhouse, and me reading my Bible, Sue's sweet voice stopped my world as she said, "Mark, I love you." We had that look and the conversation without words and we knew that although we have been through so much that we are in the Master's hands. Then Casey dumped her little crackers on the floor and crushed them in the carpet. Time to clean up another mess. Good thing the Lord is always there to keep cleaning up ours...

Lessons from my girls...and Ice Cream

My girls teach me so much about my relationship with my Father in Heaven. It seems like the knowledge I stored in my head about Him is attacking my heart,  and the main arsenal is my family. Starting with Sue- how much more awesome can you get? She loves me unconditionally Wow, what else can I say? Then Madelyn, who one minute loves me, then mommy, then James, next her baby, her playground, her rabbit, and ice cream. Lastly, Casey, who goes crazy in her bouncy seat- pogo style when I come home. When I walk through the room she whips her head around and follows me with those deep gorgeous eyes. It's really funny when this happens while Sue is trying to feed her.

The other day was a special day as I went through another course in grace and instruction. I came home from work and Casey was on the floor and started lunging towards me causing her to fall flat on her face since she is still learning  to crawl. Madelyn jumped out from behind the chair yelling, "surprise." She loves to do this when anyone enters the house. She came running towards me jabbering about the days events which I am still trying to decode. Casey reached for me drooling, wanting me to pick her up. It was pretty special to see my kids loving me and desiring to be with me, simply because I am their father. I wonder how God feels when we run with excitement into His presence? I know I was completely overwhelmed.

 

Madelyn then came to me with the football and said that she wanted to go to the backyard and throw the football. I was pumped! We yelled "Go Gators" and "TEBOW" all the way to the backyard. All that came to an abrupt stop and I found myself twirling and chanting with her, "SWIPER NO SWIPING, SWIPER NO SWIPING, SWIPER NO SWIPIIIIIIIIIING!!!!!" My dreams of fathering the female Tebow came to a crashing halt. 

 

Later in the evening Madelyn and I were craving ice cream. I am pretty sure it was more Madelyn?!?!? So we loaded up to go to Baskin Robins. Madelyn was so appreciative, sweet, and loving. We walked in and Madelyn blurted out angelically to the attendant who was with another customer, "I WANT A STRAWBERRY ICE CREAM CONE!!!!" She stole the show and knew she was adored by everyone in the store. We ate and "talked" and laughed. She stopped licking her heaven on a cone, grabbed my hand  and said,  "thank you daddy, I love you." It was so sweet. We gobbled up both delicious cones. Then, something strange happened. As the special strawberry treat disappeared, so did my angelic daughter. She wanted more ice cream right now! She was now screaming, "I want chocolate." I was amazed. I told her we needed to leave. Suddenly, she did not "love" me anymore. I was the evil one himself. Right then, I realized, our relationship with the Lord is usually ok if He is pacifying us with life "treats." When the gifts and the pampering stops or delays, we turn away to find find something else to treat ourself with. Later that evening I was reading to Madelyn and we were about to have our evening prayers. I asked her, "Madelyn, do you love Jesus?" She replied, "I love Ice Cream..."

Here are some things my girls have reminded me of:

1. Forgive. Over and over. It's Christ-like. 

2. Lunge after God, my Father. Desire Him. He will comfort me and care for me.

3. Every gift comes from the Father.

4. He provides the treats of life. I don't need to seek them out.

5. I really love the Lord. A lot. He is so amazing. I know I belong to Him and that He is crazy in love with me.

6. After the Lord, my family is the most important thing in the world. I refuse to lose sight of that again. If any of my "friends" notice it happening, I expect a slap in the head.

7. I still think Chocolate and Cookies & Cream are my favorite ice cream flavors.